Josephine is taking a much-deserved day off. As of 12:01 a.m. she was off the clock (and sleeping soundly). Since my favorite show is 24, I have decided to chronicle my day ala one season of 24. If you are not familiar with the show, each episode is one hour with each season a total of 24 hours in the life of counterterrorism agent Jack Bauer. He saves the world. My day will not be as exciting - no nuclear bombs to disarm but I did disarm one big poopy diaper.
The Following Takes Place Between...
12:00 a.m. to 1:00 a.m. Everyone is sleeping
1:00 a.m. to 2:00 a.m. Everyone is sleeping
2:00 a.m. to 3:00 a.m. Everyone is sleeping
3:00 a.m. to 4:00 a.m. Jack wakes up and is fed 2 ounces of Similac. He goes right back to sleep after a quick burp.
4:00 a.m. to 5:00 a.m. Everyone is sleeping.
5:00 a.m. to 6:00 a.m. Everyone is sleeping.
6:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m. Jedidiah wakes up and is fed 2 ounces of Similac. He goes back to sleep. Trash trucks roar down the street collecting rubbage. Jonah wakes up and then crashes on the couch.
7:00 a.m. to 8:00 a.m. Mommy wakes up confused because she did not have to feed the twins. James wakes up and joins Daddy and Jonah on the couch.
8:00 a.m. to 9:00 a.m. Joann visits and gets to hold Jedidiah. Jack is still sleeping. Jonah and James eat cereal and constantly interrupt mommy and daddy.
9:00 a.m. to 10:00 a.m. Jack wakes up - Time to play. Jed is still up.
10:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. School time for Jonah and James. Jonah works on subtraction while James colors. Jack hangs out in the chair. Jonah and James push each other around in plastic boxes. Later in the hour James trips and falls right on his nose. Ouch! Jack finally eats. Jed finally goes to sleep. Mommy leaves with a gigantic smile on her face.
11:00 a.m. to 12:00 p.m. Jack takes a nap. Jed wakes up around 11:30 and eats at 11:45. Jonah and James start watching the Babar movie.
12:00 p.m. to 1:00 p.m. Daddy gives Jedidiah the medicine he forgot to give at mealtime. Back to school. More math for Jonah - this time we are working on coins. Both babies are asleep.
1:00 p.m. to 2:00 p.m. Babar movie stopped. Lunch time for Jonah and James. Dinosaur chicken and carrots. Yum! I wake up Jack and he hangs out then eats at 1:30.
2:00 p.m. to 3:00 p.m. Jedidiah sits in his chair and watches his fingers. Jonah and James take turns using the computer (Playhouse Disney). James freaks out because he had an accident in his pullups (Poor Lightning McQueen).
3:00 p.m. to 4:00 p.m. Jack wakes up, eats, then vomits. Jedidiah takes a nap at 3:30. Jonah and James are pried free from the computer and sent to their room for a nap.
4:00 p.m. to 5:00 p.m. Jonah sneaks out of his room and hides in the living room (twice). He tries his best to convince me that he does not need to sleep anymore. Considering this is the first time everyone is asleep, Jonah must go back to his room. He has the option of reading books quietly. Daddy needs a few minutes to recharge. Jonah, sensing that Daddy is along and bored, sneaks out again to inform him that he obeyed and read books in his room and has slept enough. Jonah is sent back to his room.
5:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. I got to spend some rare time bonding with just Jonah. It was nice. James wakes up at 5:30.
6:00 p.m. to 7:00 p.m. Jack wakes up and hangs out in the chair. Jed wakes up a little later and also chills in the chair. Jonah and James play with trains and cars. Jack is fed 1 1/2 ounces of formula.
7:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. Jonah and James wathc Bugs Life. It Starts getting dicey. The twins are both hungry and crying. One eats but only a little. After switching to feed the other, he tags his teammate who begins to cry also. They are both very hungry, very tired or both (me too).
8:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. I am slowly pumping more formula in each like the gas tank of my car. Just enough and the tank is full. Too much and it overflows. I hit the magic amount and Jed gets sleepy and goes down to bed.
9:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m. Jonah and James finish watching the movie. Jack joins us as I brush teeth, change pajamas and we pray. Three down, one to go. I feed Jack one last time. I try to give him just enough to top off but not too much or else...Jack vomits several gallons worth! I pushed it one gulp too far. I put Jack down in his bed to clean up and he falls asleep. Yes!
10:00 p.m. to 11:00 p.m. I clean up the kitchen and check on the twins a few times to make sure they are alive (they never go down this easy and they haven't made a peep). God is so merciful. Josephine calls. She's on her way home. I heat up my dinner and chow down.
11:00 p.m. to 12:00 p.m. Josephine arrives home and we chat about her shopping adventures. I finish cleaning up, feed the dog and get ready for bed.
Wow, what a day. I really appreciate my wife and moms everywhere. Jack Bauer is tough but not tough enough to be a mom. Sorry Jack.
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